Weird Liverpool careers

[Kvarme Ate My Food]

Steven Caulker — comes to us on loan, and we are miles above his level. He’s a centre half but only ever plays as as striker for us, in a handful of sub appearances. 

[Ethan]

Roy Hodgson - huge c**k

[surf]

this one sounds weird, but turns out to be pretty normal

https://jobsearch.liverpoolfc.com/jobs/job/Chef-de-Partie/1152

[Maldini]

Paul Jones - signed for us at 36 when we were in a goalkeeping crisis and became our oldest debutant. Played two games before riding off into the sunset.

[Frosty Jack]

21 minutes ago, Kvarme Ate My Food said:

Steven Caulker — comes to us on loan, and we are miles above his level. He’s a centre half but only ever plays as as striker for us, in a handful of sub appearances. 

Whole thing was pretty sinister. 

[Benzo-13]

Ben Davies. Never plays except a few minutes as a sub.

[libero]

Istvan Kozma 

That's one for the oldies....

[kop205]

Jimmy Carter 

[Maldini]

Richie Partridge - more myth than man, whispers of his brilliance echoed around the halls of early internet forums only for him to turn out to be tiny and not particularly great. Later seen as our physio.

[Frosty Jack]

Some of these suggestions are just peripheral pricks and barely played bellends. Their circumstances surely need to be genuinely weird to fit in here.

[Kvarme Ate My Food]

4 minutes ago, Maldini said:

Richie Partridge - more myth than man, whispers of his brilliance echoed around the halls of early internet forums only for him to turn out to be tiny and not particularly great. Later seen as our physio.

I can never reconcile the Djimi Traore we heard about with the Djimi Traore we got.

[surf]

whoever scouted sean dundee has something to answer for

[kop205]

Pegguy Arphexad

[PhilM]

3 minutes ago, kop205 said:

Pegguy Arphexad

He had a genuinely insane career in general. Over a 26 year career he only made 41 appearances for 9 clubs and won 7 trophies, most of them for us.

[Benzo-13]

Francis Tierney. Went to sign and disappeared 

[honourablegeorge]

56 minutes ago, Maldini said:

Paul Jones - signed for us at 36 when we were in a goalkeeping crisis and became our oldest debutant. Played two games before riding off into the sunset.

Quite like that story though, hes a fan, gets a opportunity to experience it at a time in his career when he probably thought his chance had long gone.

 

49 minutes ago, Kvarme Ate My Food said:

I can never reconcile the Djimi Traore we heard about with the Djimi Traore we got.

Never seen a more awkward looking player but he did somehow manage to make it work for a period

[Gethin]

20 minutes ago, PhilM said:

He had a genuinely insane career in general. Over a 26 year career he only made 41 appearances for 9 clubs and won 7 trophies, most of them for us.

Didn’t he get binned off for acting the t*** at a Hillsborough memorial event? 

[smithdown]

Brian Kettle. 

[Benzo-13]

2 minutes ago, Gethin said:

Didn’t he get binned off for acting the t*** at a Hillsborough memorial event? 

That was Itandje.

[Swipe]

Paul Stewart. I was very young at the time but my dad supports Spurs and always seemed like Stewart was a good player.

Nigel Clough another one. Remember being made up we signed him.

Edited July 1, 2025 by Swipe

[smithdown]

Joe Cole. 

[Cheesecake]

4 minutes ago, smithdown said:

Brian Kettle. 

Is that the guy who was thrown over a pub?

[Gethin]

7 minutes ago, Benzo-13 said:

That was Itandje.

Ah yeah, cheers 

[PhilM]

Takumi Minamino. Was absolutely boss against us for Salzburg, signed for us at a really difficult time to integrate with the squad, generally played pretty well for us and scored a load to help us win the League Cup, then toddled off to Monaco and is being pretty boss again. One of many players who weren't quite good enough for us, but were pretty close.

Edited July 1, 2025 by PhilM
Got my evil Red Bull empire clubs confused.

[honourablegeorge]

1 minute ago, PhilM said:

Takumi Minamino. Was absolutely boss against us for Leipzig, signed for us at a really difficult time to integrate with the squad, generally played pretty well for us and scored a load to help us win the League Cup, then toddled off to Monaco and is being pretty boss again. One of many players who weren't quite good enough for us, but were pretty close.

He did alright, small fee, decent profit, some good goals. Everything Chiesa should be but likely won't