PhilM

Well hopefully West Ham aren't the warm up for an aggressive Mackem teabagging then. Absolutely get your point, but Frankfurt actually were mega s***e.

Real Madrid are s***e, to be fair.

How are people feeling about this? Do we think that we've turned a corner, or just beat West Ham because they're absolute balls.

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With these Tiny arms Barely keeping his goal from harm. He's got Tiny arms. Here comes Origi, sound the alarms There, I wrote a better one in less than a minute.

Why the f*** does Norman Bettison have a knighthood?

That video is art! JORDAN PICKFORD, HE'S DYNAMITEOHf***OFF!

Wouldn't that basically require him to be catatonic in a wheelchair?

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Not sure how anyone could argue that it doesn't. According to Transfermarkt, half of the teams in the league's entire squad cost less than that. https://www.transfermarkt.co.uk/premier-league/einkaufswert/wettbewerb/GB1#google_vignette

Maybe he nipped in when the cameras weren't looking.

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If we lose by more than two goals, we go behind Everton on goal difference don't we?

We're not the same as everyone else. No other teams have lost 9 out of their last 12 games after breaking the British transfer record twice.

Liverpool kick off and have loads of stagnant possession for the first five minutes. Then Jared Bowen gets goal side of Kerkez and crosses for Paqueta to score an easy tap in after easily floating clear of Van Dijk. Liverpool have more stagnant possession. Mo crosses for Cody Gakpo to head harmlessly over the bar. Alexander Isak lopes around the edge of the box and racks up no touches. Dom scores a speculative long range blooter and doesn't even bother celebrating because he's too handsome and knows the script. Half time, 1-1. 49 minutes in, Konate charges out and misses a simple header 20 yards out, allowing small town boy Crysensio Summerville to turn away and run away. Konate drags him back, then falls over. Summerville continues his run and slots under Alisson to make it 2-1. Konate gets booked, as Virgil looks at the floor. Liverpool heads visibly drop. Again 20 minutes of side to side, back to the keeper drudgery, a few chances which we slice wide or over. Gakpo cuts in and blams one into row Z. Everyone has a laugh at it smashing some poor fella right in his bag of crisps. Gakpo does his salute anyway because those crisps belonged to Jesus. Ekitike comes on for a yet again completely feckless Isak and gets the crowd up a bit with a run from half way which ends in him getting fouled. No free kick. As the Liverpool players complain, West Ham break 4 on 3 and Jared Bowen scores an easy third for the 1966 World Cup Winners. 79 minutes, Chiesa comes on for Cody Gakpo to add something different - actual effort. He runs around like a madman, winning the ball back a couple of times and eventually getting a booking for clattering Mavroupanos. He gets our first shot for 15 minutes by snatching at an opportunity and it goes straight to Areola. His song rings out and sounds f***in boss. 85 minutes, Rio comes on for MacAllister, who most people didn't realise was even playing. He makes a mug of Aaron Wan-Bissaka, and wins Liverpool a corner. Areola nips through the crowd, bloots forwards, and Fernandes lays it off for Callum Wilson to score a fourth as Virgil struggles to get back from the corner in time. Full time, 4-1 and the Reds have lost again. Arne Slot looks baldly at his feet and wonders why doing exactly the same as he always does had exactly the same effect that it always does. Liverpool fans slope Scousely off to the pub, wondering what the point of all this is.

Immoral, like Kleberson immoral?

Arne has them all on an Easyjet to Ibiza airport. They're off to cane it with Jorg Schmadke.

Gasperini would be a laugh. His Atalanta side were a menace

Ha ha, BetVictor doing 66-1 on Trent Alexander Arnold being our next manager. #bantz

Harsh on Hassony there. Maybe he's an acquired taste, but that's uncalled for.

Theres's something weird about his head shape too. Like he was birthed with forceps before his mum even went into labour.

Seems to be avoiding a lot of flak, but he's been absolutely f***in s***e this season, both as a defender, and presumably as a captain.

Demote Virgil and make him captain.

Arne versus his nemesis from last season.