PhilM

With Jota, it's important to accept that everyone deals with grief differently and we don't really know what effect it's having. It might have an effect on concentration or mood, but it's not making people s*** out of challenges in moments on a football pitch. Cody Gakpo isn't going "I'm not going for that tackle because I'm really sad". Plus we signed a tonne of new players and most of them didn't know him, so what's their excuse?

"Liverpool cannot keep losing" The squad: "Hold my beer"

Not sure if you're talking about the highlights or The Human Centipede, but they're both really tough w***s.

Kids can't learn proper supporting a football team without seeing their da leaping to his feet, throwing food and drink everywhere, and shouting "f*** off", either in joy or rage. It's as traumatic for pets as bonfire night too.

For some reason, I got yer man from Silence of the Lambs in my head. Was it that?

It's bizarre. He has four right back options and none of them are apparently up to scratch.

Horrible Histories is absolutely brilliant. Every now and then I revert to their song about English Monarchs in my head for the pub quiz.

We have one, it's just that the manager keeps playing him at right back.

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Nagelsmann? Seems implausible just before a World Cup.

Not the usual combination of "Nunez" and "miss" that we generally see.

Not that I'm suggesting we choose him, but I bet even Steven Gerrard would have won more of those games than Arne Slot has.

Thing is, anyone we put in his place will definitely do better than two wins in 11 games. Even f***in Hodgson would do better than that.

We're basically United last year.

Every time I think we've hit rock bottom, somehow we find a new one.

Or in fact any important aspect of the game...

Get in the bin.

I think he might have more of that than Connor Bradley right now though, so there is that.

I'm up for trying Calvin Ramsay. What's the worst that can happen?

Just to be extra cheery as well, Szoboslai is one yellow card away from a suspension.

Un blerto egocéntrico!

Saw one of the fellas from Westlife in an airport once with his girlfriend from Hollyoaks. He was tiny, like child sized. Or may just far away.

Well, just as long as you're doing your duty to remind him occasionally. Had a similar thing with a work colleague about Pete Burns when Dead Or Alive rereleased You Spin Me Round after he was on Big Brother. "It was a small screen and I've had a few pints" was the excuse.

We'll have the last laugh because eventually he'll end up managing Manchester United and no fate that we can conjure up could match that for depravity.

Well I for one love it when KAMF goes off on a massive tangent. Do Hanson count? The two youngest ones looked the same and the oldest one looked like an Easter Island statue in a wig.