Cacofonix the Bard

Great feet for what appears to a notably tall and muscular chap. Very one-footed at this stage though

16 games, 14 goals, 10 assists for Marmoush. 10 games, 11 goals, 7 assists in the league.

Just watched the City-Bournemouth Match of the Day highlights. Yes, please let's buy Kerkez. Let us do it with great haste.

Well, that might be the problem

That he was a "mediocre keeper who thought he was Gordon Banks"

Do these c**** not realise we're better than them?

This is actually really good. Sander knew the right things to ask and they're clearly comfortable around each other. Interesting that he's aware of that brutal Carragher quote about him. I always wonder how things like that go down with the people being described negatively in autobiographies.

Yeah I thought he had a beautiful first touch and thought it was only a matter of time before he broke into the team and started putting teams to the sword. And actually, when we first signed him I thought he was the final piece in the GH team that would take us from 2nd place to the title. Wasn't he ranked as the second best player in France this season? Anyway, he looked like Zidane with hair.

I take back most of the things I said and most of the things I thought

Wow that was appalling positioning by the goalkeeper though

Grav had a fair bit to aim at there tbh

Yeah, I reckon he'll have his good games as well this season but we'll probably be in the market for one in the summer. It's time to put ourselves out there and find someone younger and perkier who makes us laugh again. We can keep Robbo for Wednesday night booty calls.

I was just thinking to myself yesterday, maybe I'll change my username to "Paulie Walnuts". Well back to the drawing board then.

We've been s*** and made to look second rate. They all need to snort some seriously fat lines off the tactics board before they come out

f*** off d****eads

He had legs like enormously long, stretchy, bendy tentacles and could take the ball off people at will. Wonderful player to watch going about his work

What the f*** was that shot from Dom

Jim Beglin touched on something similar on the international coverage

Gah, was hoping his injury record would be better under Slot

This is such a great piece. I feel like we've had more than what was the usual share of Scottish players for English clubs even back then

What's he said?

Getting lots of vitriol in Germany for this apparently

Haven't been able to watch much so far. Have we been any good?

Bayern is not a city, lads

Reminds me of Cisse or Baros in that they started out being prone to making dumb decisions and didn't seem to get better with more experience