Bald Devil

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Their advert on tv makes me want to kick the thing in. Cheesey twots in England & Brazil shirts cheering in front of the box with a feckin Chelsea badge on the wall. Grown men FFS. Someone needs to hoy a Molotov cocktail through their window.

They'll turn Goodison into a Tesco, that's what they normally do.

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More than 20,000 empty seats vs Fenerbahce and over 25,000 who stayed at home vs Portsmouth in the League Cup suggest that the part-time pricks get all they deserve.

Favourite team mate = Arjen Robben.

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I bet he got a little stiffy hearing the Southend bells singing Easeh too.

Ecija? That was f***in painful. Even Lee Sharpe could get it right.

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Sort of. Ben used to work there yes. And then his missus did. We also did some Market Research for them. How do you know Ben? Do i know you? I worked there with Ben & Leanne till last summer, so I know the signed tuff from them is legit. I might have met you at their wedding do or the Stanley before the game, or the Ataturk. I was the slap-heed wool.

Is that through Ben?

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Some of it looks jarg to me, but there's other stuff that I know is legit like the '65 FA Cup final thing (unless they're photocopies - can't tell off the site). They give the same old cack about a Certificate of Authenticity but they're only issuing it themselves, so it means nothing. Ask yourself how they get hold of so much stuff and why they haven't got a postal or registered address on their site. They only use Paypal as well, so they're not registered for credit cards etc. Why not?

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Played. Does he remember the Marc-Vivien Foe thing as well? Some City fans started their own boycott after the rag printed his picture on the front page.

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Dirk & Crouchy have formed such a good partnership in the last 2 games they've been merged into the conjoined Kuych