Leo No.8

I'd honestly put Diao in the Sean Dundee category. He looked like he couldn't play football. I'm sure him and Audley Harrison got mixed up somewhere along the line; we got the boxer and they got the footballer. It would explain a lot in both cases...

To anyone who says Lampard is as good as Gerrard, my answer is quite simply 'in what areas'? If you assess the players in each area of their game, I really don't know how even a Chelsea fan could argue with the assertion that Gerrard is quicker, better running with the ball, better in the tackle, better in the air and more versatile. It really is a simple case of saying what is each player good at. Up until this season, Lampard scored more goals which was a big advantage he had over Stevie. Well this season the only box Gerrard had a cross in now has a tick. I don't think you can reasonably say Lampard is better at anything than Steven Gerrard now, and in turn I think Gerrard is a level up from him. Lampard is an effective goalscoring midfielder at the highest level. Gerrard is one of the world's best footballers.

Donkey rides on a beach in the South of France. Needs to do some work in the gym on his back to prepare for the strain of petit enfants...

I think its really hard to separate a number of players when you look at the world's best. I think its fair to say that Ronaldinho stands out as the best in the world - you could make a case for that and justify it. But then you could argue until you were blue in the face about separating Henry, Gerrard and Shevchenko all of whom I'd have equal second. Of course I'd favour Stevie, but I'm biased; I'm sure Arsenal and Milan supporters would disagree. Then personally I'd have a larger third group with the likes of Kaka, Terry, Eto'o, Cech, Riquelme and Rooney in it just behind them. Says a lot for Madrid's decline, that I wouldn't have any of their players in any of those groups...

Apparently Robbie saw a couple of 23-year olds lurking round Anfield. When he moved to confront them, they ran off at pace, leaving Fowler puffing and panting shouting for them to stop... Draw your own conclusions.

See now I just can't understand why anyone would want us to spend a large chunk of our budget on an expensive right-midfielder. At present we've got Gerrard, Sissoko, Alonso, Kewell all of whom demand a starting place. Then you've got Gonzales coming in who looks a real talent and Garcia who will continue to score crucial goals from midfield. Of course there will be injuries and players leaving, but that first choice midfield four give us such a good balance, you wouldn't want to leave any of them out for the big games, and the other two I've mentioned have to be classed as top class squad players at the very least. I'd use the money we have to bring in two top-class strikers instead, moving on Morientes and Cisse. Bringing in another high-profile midfielder would upset the balance of things for me; Pennant, in my opinion fits the bill perfectly. He is young, English, very talented (anyone who says otherwise must have sh*te in their eyes), available at a reasonable price and crucially, would be willing to be rotated, at least for a while. Pennant has a low centre of gravity (runs like Giggs), he's quick, hugs the touchline, works hard and delivers a great ball into the box. Every time I've seen him this season he's stood out like a sore thumb in that Birmingham team, and I believe he could become one hell of a player in the right set-up, which he'd have here. My mate the brummy who knows all the people in the press down there, and a few agents etc left our company a few months ago, so I haven't spoken to him, but I'll give him a call tonight to see if he's heard this at all, because if it's true he will. He said Pennant is a decent lad, gets on with everyone fine, he's just thick. He's actually illiterate having been brought up by his yardie dad. He said he's obsessed with Liverpool FC, a genuine boyhood fan, who'd do anything to come here. We'd make the best of this lad I'm sure - sign him Rafa.

Strangely didn't know about him being that ill - poor lad, he's had a bad run of it since leaving Charlton. Left out at Chelsea, had to move to the perennial underachievers in the North East, now he gets a nasty illness that keeps him out of the world cup. I suppose some would say it serves him right for engineering his move to Chelsea, but I've rated him very highly since he broke through at Charlton, and he does always seem to give 100%...

Good shout that Scott Parker - forgot him! He'd actually be my first choice for the holding role, leaving Beckham on the right and Lennon as an impact sub along with Crouchie. Knew there was someone I was forgetting. I suppose I'd counted him out as he doesn't seem to have been involved, but I'd prefer him to Carrick myself...

*Edit - now I getcha Stuff! As I said, I'd rather Carra behind him myself, but Sven just won't do it...

Yes, United already seemed to be well-stocked for talented but over-priced defenders who can't actually defend, even before signing Evra. Now they have another one...

Seen him do it just fine for Madrid a few times gents - can't understand the outrage...

He is such a bell-end. All the crap he's been talking has probably reduced his chances of getting it if anything...

He doesn't look too hot so far - buying from France is a perilous business it seems...

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Yeah Mike - I'm in exactly the same situation, ST with two credits, and its tomorrow for us...

I had a laugh at them when they went down, but I'd actually be happy to see Leeds back up now. They've served their time...

Carrick is having a good season, and has been outstanding lately. However Beckham has also been doing well in a poor Madrid side, and he does have loads of experience of international tournaments. So if I were to throw the young lad in on the right, I wouldn't want to lose the skipper so would shift him in the holding role, which he can do well. Of course you'd also miss his delivery from dead-ball situations.

Hello Rory my old mate, how are things? Well my curious Irish friend, my formation would be: ---------------------------------Robinson---------------------------------- Neville--------------Terry------------------Ferdinand----------------A.Cole ---------------------------------Beckham----------------------------------- Lennon----------------------------------------------------------------J.Cole --------------------------------Lampard------------------------------------- -------------------------Gerrard--------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------Owen--------------------------------------- I'd prefer to use Crouchie as a last half hour kind of weapon, and if Rooney doesn't make it I'd like to see Gerrard just off the front man. I'd prefer Carra to the inreliable Ferdinand, but lets face it, it isn't going to happen, so I've put the big dope in anyway. My shock inclusion would be Lennon; I think he ticks all the right boxes to be a big success at a major international tournament, the same way Owen and Rooney were. He is practically unknown outside England, full of confidence, in fantastic form and has the kind of pace and skill which will take defenders by surprise. Sven isn't one to take risks so I can't see it, but if I was the boss I'd throw the young lad in and play Beckham in the holding role behind Lampard...

That he is, cracking little player though. A bit Beardsley-like in looks and ability...

Think it would bother Fergie more - after all Jose has already won it with Porto in his relatively short management career, wheras Demento has only one CL for his many, many years at the top. I still think Ferguson would have retired a couple of years ago if he had one more European Cup in the bank...

Indubitably he does my dear fellow - deep joy...

There was a real close-up of Riquelme and you could see in his eyes he didn't fancy taking that penalty at all. He proved it by taking the ultimate sh1thouse penalty - no conviction, low and to the keeper's left. Riquelme is a supremely talented footballer, a brilliant passer of the ball and dictator of play. But I think he's a confidence player in some ways. Look at how much better he has performed being the 'big fish' at Villareal, after he was garbage at Barca. A real talent, but a few mental deficiencies in my opinion - someone else should have taken that penalty. Wouldn't surprise me if he flops in the World Cup...

I've always had a lot of time for Henry. Yes, he can be slightly arrogant, but for me not in a distasteful way; his football is that good it requires a certain level of arrogance, but as a man he strikes me as very honest and decent, a total gent. As nd said, very mixed feelings; I really like Henry, but I don't like Wenger at all, in fact I think he's a complete prat. I hope a journo reminds him of last year's comments about our Champions League campaign just to see what his response is; judging by his usual form, he'll just say he didn't say it, stick his fingers in his ears and repeat 'I can't hear you, I can't hear you'. His post match comments are bordering on the ridiculous more often than not. Know what - people talk about him standing up to Ferguson, but I actually think I prefer old whiskey-nose of the two. The fans always seem to me to be about the best you come across; when we beat them in the FA Cup final in 2001 they were superbly gracious in defeat. I'm not sure I could have dealt with outplaying the opposition for 80 minutes then seeing them snatch the game the way we did through Owen, anywhere near as well as most of their fans I met after in Cardiff who still smiled and had words of congratulation despite their misery. So for the fans, and Henry I'd be delighted if they won it. On the other hand, I'd also delight in hearing Wenger explain how they should have had eight penalities and all four of Barca's unanswered goals should have been disallowed - spout his usual crap for the whole world to listen to how ridiculous he is if they lose. And for all the mixed feelings, one over-rides everything; ultimately Liverpool Football Club is the most important thing to me, and our position would surely be weakened by a stronger, richer Arsenal. So purely for us, I hope they lose. But I'll still be happy for their supporters and the man who'll lift the trophy should they win it.

Come on Maldini, tell us how long Alves took to get his passport - why all the secrecy?

How much would he cost though? Surely no chance we'd spend the kind of fee he'd command on an area we are already strong in. Only club who'd spend the kind of money we're talking about and need him enough to do so is Madrid...