Goalkeepers: w*****, t***, s***. Defenders: Tweety Pie, Tweedledum, J. Carragher (Liverpool), Prick, Loser, w***stain, a****** Midfielders: Cockgoblin, S. Gerrard (Liverpool), Fat Turd, p*******s, Nobjockey, The Diving Swan, The Prancing Filly, Thundercnut Strikers: The Welsh Dragon, Granny Shagger, P. Crouch (Liverpool), Loadsamoney, Lolloping Wazzock