Dear Marj

[Murphman]

One of our oldest dearest friend has always been a bit of a dreamer. She hears stories and within a few days she was there at the event and witnessed it. She fly's around the world looking at property to buy but her old man is a plumber and she hasn't got any money, just likes to 'big it up' all the time. As she's getting older it's getting embarassing, we see people smirking at the ever worsening horsesh*t that come out of her mouth. She talks down to people that she feels superior to, even though she lives in an ex council house, patronising doesn't go close and if the company is educated or well off then it's like listening to Mrs Bouquet.

 

It's all ridiculous, we love her to death, her good points are outstanding, I would trust her to bring up my kids, their kids are our god children, so we let it go and bite our tongues. Until last night....

 

She had a pop at me out of nowhere, she talks to her old man like a lump of sh*t and somehow carried on in that vein with me (not a good idea). One of my oldest friends was out last night, he'd found out I was on a False beginners French course, he was fascinated as he wants to learn Spanish. We went to school together, a Grammar school where foreign languages are high priority on the cirriculum (She went to the local comp with my Missus who doesn't speak a word of French) and he was asking me how much harder the 'learning experience' has with age.

 

Out of nowhere she says with a snarl

 

'Oh my God, you should hear his French accent, it's the worst I've ever heard', gobsmacked I told her she'd never heard me speak French (plus according to my tutor my accent is fine) to which she replied she had,and that it was almost as bad as her husband trying to speak Spanish (which doesn't) and then my mates wife said, 'Oh, do you speak French then?, to which she replied

 

'fluently' but it's been a while.

 

And I broke the golden rule and told her she was telling porkies.

 

That is all.

[Duncan Disorderly]

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[Benitez]

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