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Grizzly bear times rage all wrong


Gilps

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Officials have said they are puzzled by what provoked the bear, who had been touted as one of the "best trained" in showbusiness.

 

A grizzly bear which featured in the recent Will Ferrell film Semi-Pro

 

Try putting two and two together

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From "A Walk in the Woods" by Bill Bryson...

 

"...grizzlies are large, powerful and ferociously bad-tempered. When Lewis and Clark went into the wilderness, they found that nothing unnerved the Native Americans more than a grizzly, and not surprisingly since you could riddle a grizzly with arrows - positively porcupine it - and it would still keep coming. Even Lewis and Clark with their big guns were astounded and unsettled by the ability of the grizzly to absorb volleys of lead with barely a wobble.

 

Herrero recounts an incident that nicely conveys the near indestructability of the grizzly. It concerns a professional hunter in Alaska named Alexei Pitka, who stalked a big male through snow and finally felled it with a well-aimed shot to the heart from a large-bore rifle. Pitka should probably have carried a card with him that said: 'First make sure bear is dead. Then put gun down.' He advanced cautiously and spent a minute or two watching the bear for movement, but when there was none he set the gun against a tree - big mistake - and strode forward to claim his prize. Just as he arrived, the bear sprang up, clapped it's expansive jaws around the front of Pitka's head, as if giving him a big kiss, and with a single jerk tore off his face.

 

Miraculously, Pitka survived. 'I don't know why I set that durn gun against the tree,' he said later. Actually what he said was, 'Mrfff mmmpg nnnmmm mffffffn,' on account of having no lips, teeth, nose, tongue or other vocal apparatus."

Edited by Duncan Disorderly
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I remember being posted to Canada for the whole of 1985. For our R+R we drove to Montana and Wyoming. When we crossed the border we came to this little shanty of a town where boss eyed inbreds were giving us dirty looks in a bar. We decided to drive on and ignored the sign saying don't use the Rockies route after 10pm. We just lifted the barrier up and carried on our journey. The cloud cover was upon us in minutes few and it took an age to drive through the Rockies due to the lack of vision. We were getting out of the car every 20 minutes to rest the eyesight and have a quick tab.

 

On our return journey we travelled in daylight. It was a shock to the system to see sheer drops of hundreds of feet with no barrier to stop a car going over and the amount of bears at the side of the road was frightening. How the f*** we survived that journey i'll never know.

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