For the golfers

[Whitey]

Got emailed these the other day, and I'm still cracking up at them, so thought I'd share...enjoy!!

 

Some common terms explained

 

A *Paris Hilton* - an expensive hole

A *Dennis Wise* - a nasty 5 footer

A *Salman Rushdie* - an impossible read

A *Rock Hudson* - looked straight, but it wasn't

A *Cuban* - needed one more revolution

An *Elton John *- a big bender that lips the rim

An *Adolf Hitler* - two shots in the bunker

A Saddam Hussein - from one bunker straight into another

A *Yasser Arafat* - ugly and in the sand

A *Kate Winslett* - little bit fat but otherwise perfect

A *Gerry Adams* - playing a Provisional

A *Glen Miller* - didn't make it over the water

An *Arthur Scargill* - a great strike but a poor result

A *Russell Grant* - a fat iron

A *Rodney King* - over-clubbed

An *O.J. Simpson* - got away with it

A *Princess Grace* - should have taken a driver

A *Princess Di* - shouldn't have taken a driver

A *Robin Cook* - just died on the hill

A *Michael Jackson* - gradually fading

A *Douglas Bader* - looked good in the air, but didn't have the legs

A *Ken Livingstone* - quite far left

A *Jean-Marie LePen* - a long way right

A *Ladyboy* - looks like an easy hole but all is not what it seems

A *condom* - safe but didn't feel real good

A *circus tent* - a BIG top

An *Anna Kournikova* - looks great, but unlikely to get a result

A *Vinnie Jones* - nasty kick when you're not expecting it

A *Sally Gunnell* - ugly, but a good runner

A *Liz McColgan* - Ugly but runs forever

A* Brazilian* - Shaves both sides of the hole

A gynaecologists assistant - One that shaves the hole

A nipple licker - A shot that opens up the HOLE