Tell you who/what I hate...

[Hassony]

People who are late for meetings at work, b*****ds

[Barnes' left foot]

Taylor Swift

Jeremy Hunt

Jose Mourinho

Kate Winslet

[Mike]

Taylor Swift?

[Duncan Disorderly]

Garth Crooks

[Des]

Duncan Disorderly.

[Hassony]

Taylor Swift

Jeremy Hunt

Jose Mourinho

Kate Winslet

Leave TayTay alone

 

And again, what's wrong with winslet?

[Barnesy_10]

Russell Howard

Jeremy Clarkson

Sandy Toksvig

[Duncan Disorderly]

Duncan Disorderly.

That's unfair, I love all of you!

[Des]

That's unfair, I love all of you!

 

Only messin with you Dunc.

 

 

Or am I?

[muleskinner]

Leave TayTay alone

 

And again, what's wrong with winslet?

ned rocknroll

[Duncan Disorderly]

People who piss all over the floor of the work toilets. What's wrong with you sieve dick

This. There's somone in our work who does this, I mean, there's a f***in puddle in front of the bowl at times. WTF is that about? I wouldn't like to imagine what their keks smell like!

[scoose]

This. There's somone in our work who does this, I mean, there's a f***in puddle in front of the bowl at times. WTF is that about? I wouldn't like to imagine what their keks smell like!

 

Scruffy t***s who do this like

[RBM]

This. There's somone in our work who does this, I mean, there's a f***in puddle in front of the bowl at times. WTF is that about? I wouldn't like to imagine what their keks smell like!

How do they manage it? Is the force of pressure that high that their penis is flailing around like a loose hosepipe?

[Hassony]

Maybe they're midgets/dwarves/elves

[cymrococh]

I came across this the other day. I panicked and thought the next person in would think it was me so used sh*tloads of paper towels to mop it up, ensuring I never actually touched any wetness.

 

Nobody walked in during this process thankfully, as it dawned on me later that mopping it up made it look even more like I'd done it.

[Duncan Disorderly]

I think I read somewhere that men in Germany traditionally sit down for a number 1.

[Benzo-13]

I think I read somewhere that men in Germany traditionally sit down for a number 1.

Good idea that.. Twice the reading done!!

[Ripley]

People who actually say, "MMWAH", when giving you a kiss on the cheek or the air nearby.

[Duncan Disorderly]

People who actually say, "MMWAH", when giving you a kiss on the cheek or the air nearby.

And the double-cheek kiss, does my head in, it's not the done thing round these parts, unless you're a wannabe, middle-class muppet.

[cymrococh]

I'm stealing this off Bigal a bit, but old uncool people who say things are 'cool' and 'funky', and people who call bodywarmers gilets. Usually the same people actually.

 

The bloke who does my mum's garden calls himself 'funky wellies' for no reason whatsoever, he doesn't even wear garish wellies.

[Duncan Disorderly]

The word "us", spoken by some people, with a zed, instead of a strong ess.

Edited February 26, 2016 by Duncan Disorderly

[Hassony]

The word "us", spoken by some people, with a zed, instead of a strong ess.

Who doz that?

[Murphman]

I hate weird dreams and they don't come any weirder than the one I had last night, vivid and weird, it felt so real I woke up thinking about it.

 

I had to capture and then strangle a ginger cat because he was in ISIS.

 

FFS...

[Duncan Disorderly]

Who doz that?

Try applying uniformity to this:

 

Though the lough on the bough, I cough.

Edited February 26, 2016 by Duncan Disorderly

[Cobs]

I hate weird dreams and they don't come any weirder than the one I had last night, vivid and weird, it felt so real I woke up thinking about it.

 

I had to capture and then strangle a ginger cat because he was in ISIS.

 

FFS...